Graduation Looming on the Horizon

Today I had the last final exam of my undergraduate college career. My backpack is all cleaned out, my binders of notes are on a shelf, and everything school related is put away (except for my cap and gown). I can’t even begin to describe what a relief it is not to have the pressure of grades in my life any more. It’s like a huge weight has been lifted and it’s one less stress in my life.

Graduating, though, brings along a whole new stress to replace the one of passing exams. After Sunday, everything changes. I feel like I will finally be one step closer to feeling like a real adult. I’m excited, scared, and just confused in general when it comes to my future. I don’t have a job lined up yet even though it seems like almost everyone from my class does and I worry that by the time I get my CRT credentials so that I can start working, there won’t be any positions left in the area. I also worry that I won’t even pass the credentialing exams. I am confident that I can pass the CRT exam without any problems, but I’m worried about the RRT. The written part will probably be fine, but it’s the clinical simulation (ClinSim) portion that worries me. I just barely passed the practice one we took as a class a couple of weeks ago, and I’m told that most people actually fail the official one the first time they take it. I guess the best I can do is to have faith that things will work out. I know I’ve had the privilege of studying under the best minds in the field and in being a graduate of one of the best programs in the country (I’m told that when I tell them where I graduated from, they’ll expect a lot more out of me than someone who didn’t attend this program). I must trust in the knowledge I’ve been given and the experiences I’ve had.

I was listening to the radio tonight and heard this song from Five For Fighting called “Story of Your Life” and thought the lyrics were pretty fitting for my current situation, so I thought I’d share them:

“In the story your life
you're moving down the page
As the words begin to change
The story of your life
You live it everyday
You can run, you run
But you won't get away

I don't know what's coming up
Where will you go now
it's the story of your life”

And on more of a personal note now: Despite how nice it is to be free from classes, I have been kind of bored. I spent the last 4 years of my life going to class, studying, and going to work for the most part. I had little scraps of time over long weekends or school breaks to enjoy my hobbies and activities, but after being home most of the last 3 days with nothing productive to do, I’m ready to be busy again. I’m ready to dive back into the things that make me…me. Even this blog is helping with that (I’ve always loved to write). I made a list of what I want to spend my time doing and things I want to accomplish. My number one thing is to get back to studying Japanese. For being a class I took on a whim in high school (a friend asked me to sign up with her), I sure have developed a passion for it over the years. I taught it to myself once, and I can do it again now that I have the time to commit to it. I guess it doesn’t surprise me that now that I am finally free from having to study, I choose to do so anyway. Learning has always been something I valued. When I was little, it was for the grades and the praise that went along with them, but as I’ve grown older I realized that learning new things makes me feel like a better person somehow. I feel this is a trait that can only help me throughout my career.